The Mothers Tea

An idea I just love the thought of. As you know, gathering for tea is all the rage. Although I suppose the words "rage" and "tea" are kind of conflicting. Anyway.
So I was sitting here this morning drinking my chai while writing a proposal for a glorious Naples Beach wedding weekend next spring. While listing out all the events planned, I felt like something was missing. In this case, the mother of the bride has been my contact. In fact, I have a feeling she and I will be doing most of the planning together as the bride is quite busy with work. It just seemed to me that the moms so frequently get left out of it after all the work involved in planning. With that, I am inspired to plan for this client
The Mothers Tea.
I imagine it as a small gathering of the ladies: moms & sisters of the bride & groom, grandmas, aunts, moms best friend, and the bride. Maybe also the bridal party if the moms are close to these girls too. I think the event should be hosted by the bride & groom.Its a great opportunity to really spend some quality time with the ladies of the family your moms are closest to, and also to have them all get to know each other and of course its an opportunity to wear a great hat. This would also be a wonderful time to gift your moms with something special for the wedding day, perhaps a piece of jewelry, handkerchief, or clutch?

Do you like the idea? I sent my dear friend Risa of the Partea Planner a message today, hoping she'll send me some photos to share. You can check out her website for Partea inspiration.

Photo credit: the always fabulous Hilary Hopkins

Mother of the bride, Mother of the Groom.

Your mom should be this happy at your wedding.
Photo credit: Impressions Photography

When it comes to weddings, let's face it, the mom subject can be touchy. So here's just a few things I've learned over the years that I think will make your wedding experience great for everyone. Come wedding day your moms will be so happy, and feel like honored guests.

1. Decide early on (as in pre-engagement party)who will have what roles. Take the moms out for coffee or lunch individually and tell them what level of involvement you'd like them to have in the planning, by asking them for their involvement in specific tasks.
2. Don't ask for help with planning everything. Why? Because once you open that door it can't be shut without hurting someones feelings. You're best off asking for help and or opinions as the need arises.
3. I'm a mom. If my daughters don't involve me in some way I would be so hurt. Don't do this to your mother. Bring the moms together occasionally and give them updates over lunch if they aren't involved in the planning. Special notes to my daughters: I will not have this discussion with you for at least 12 more years. Don't even think about it.
4. Include his mom in something individually during the planning. This is crucial. Make sure she knows all about what you're planning before the rehearsal. I can not stress this enough, how important it is.
5. On wedding day make certain that the moms are paid special attention. This means having a server at the cocktail hour and reception 100% dedicated to parents. Give your venue coordinator their favorite drinks before wedding day so that they can wow them and make sure they are offered every single butlered item.
6. Make absolutely sure that your photographer spends time with both moms and you and your husband individually. This is a BIG deal.

Momzilla

Yep. It has happened. More times than I can count on one hand. Moms and future Mother-n-laws who give more than 2 cents. More like $1.99. I kind of get why, and it almost...almost makes sense. As long as you've been dreaming of your wedding day- it goes double for them. So yeah, they want it perfect too. The problems usually arise when what you think is perfect, is most certainly not what she thinks is perfect. What's the best way to handle it? Play it it fair and be upfront from the get go. Invite the help where you do want it, and request where you don't want it. Really, you'll be so happy you did.

Oh, and when you ask your mom for help, make it special. Take her to lunch, talk it all out, and give her a nice gift. Emily Post just put out this new book, Emily Post's Wedding Planner for Moms. I think your mom and/or future mother-n-law will be tickled pink. Oh, and if you really want to impress her, show her that you got yourself the brides version. Even I use it- it does have answers to some tricky questions.

Wedding Bells

Well how about that. I hate to be harsh, I really do. But I was so looking forward to a really funny show about wedding planners and their experiences. Boy was I ever duped by the previews.
I only laughed twice during the show, both times at the assistant who was responsible for chasing down the blonde wedding crashing twins.
I guess I am most shocked because it was so absurd. There are enough hilarious wedding stories that really happen, which could totally be exaggerated into a sitcom format, to have the show run twice daily. But nooooooo, instead they have a wedding planner sleeping with married groomsmen in broom closets, a chef seducing yet another wedding planner with Putinesca, a chain smoking bride running down the street and over a guy, and a mother of the bride faking tears with visine. And that whole thing with the bride and the band leader? Give me a break. Ugh.
Seriously, if they had just taken the Law and Order method, you know, "Ripped from the headlines", the show would have been hilarious. Somebody get me a producer.

Crying at and about a wedding

I cry at every wedding. Seriously, every single one. And its always at the same times:
When I see my bride in her dress.
When I see the look on the grooms face when he sees his bride the 1st time.
The 1st dance.
The father of the brides toast (and sometimes the dance too).
When I have to say goodbye.

Saying goodbye is the worst though. I can't tell you how many times I have sat and outright sobbed with a bride. I do get attached to my clients. Usually we've been working together for nearly a year or longer on the most important day of her life! How could I not get attached?
So yeah, I get pretty excited when the photographer releases the pictures. And I can't wait to share them with everyone and hang my favorite in my office. And I just love when they get video and the videographer sends me a copy. I get such a kick out of watching everyone so happy. I pop popcorn, call in my girls, and we watch together. Emily (she's 4) doesn't understand why I cry when I watch the wedding dvd's. But she does love to dance along with the reception highlights. Madeline (she's 8), she cries with me. I guess we're both romantics.

Weddings are so great.

Happy Valentines Day!

Anybody get engaged today? It's still kind of early, hopefully by tonight I'll start to hear about some exciting proposals. I got engaged on Valentines day 10 years ago. I can hardly believe its been that long. It's been a great 10 years.
Speaking of engagements, let's talk about engagement photos. What are they for, and why do you get them, and should you even bother.
Personally, I think they're great. For so many reasons. You can use them on your wedding website, your mom can put them in the paper with the engagement announcement, you can use them as your holiday card picture, and there are even some wedding invitations that have photos printed right on them. It's also really nice to just have a great picture for your office desk, and somewhere in the house.
Then there's the "wedding planner reasoning". This wedding planner will tell you that spending that hour or 2 with your wedding photographer, months before the wedding will make a huge difference come wedding day. You will know how your photographer works, and your photographer will learn the best ways to get the best out of you. So then on your wedding day, its someone you know taking your photos, and everyone can be comfortable and full of smiles.
Most wedding photographers offer packages that include engagement photos. If not, just ask if its something you can add on.
Photo Credits:
Michelle Reed Photography
Gigi Hamlett Photography

Holiday Surprises!

This has been such a great holiday season. I have to tell you about my Christmas because it ROCKED! Christmas morning we woke up to one of my wedding day 2-way radios, "Mom we're awake. Can we come out?" Explanation: last year our kids got up and saw all the stuff Santa brought and we didn't get to see the looks on their faces. So this year, before they went to bed, we gave them a radio. We told them to radio us when they woke up and we'd come get them- not to leave the room! Needless to say, it was hilarious. Even at 7am.
So at Christmas dinner at my sister-n-laws house, she announced she was finally having a baby! It was just the greatest thing to hear. I cried of course. All of my clients who are newlyweds know that I am forever crying- totally water works factory. I honestly didn't think it could get better. I was wrong.
After dinner, we went to our best friends house for a Christmas party. I'm telling everyone the great news about my sister, and one of our closest friends says, "Guess what! I'm pregnant too!" I screamed, and started crying again. They're due just 2 weeks apart. Great night huh? Believe it or not, that wasn't the end of it.
An hour later, my best friend makes a toast to the pregnant friend, and at the end of the toast says, "And I have one more surprise. Follow me out to the dock." We get outside, and our other set of friends (who I set up exactly 2 years ago this week), is on the boat with Reverend Chris. It was a surprise wedding. I immediately broke into tears- again. Actually, by this point I'm completely sobbing.
Ok, so maybe I was a little sad about not getting to plan even a little bit of the wedding. But getting to watch as a guest was priceless.
Happy holidays everyone, and I hope yours are as special as mine.

Chef Julio got married!

Yesterday was Chef Julios wedding! It was a great wedding despite the stormy weather. Fortunately, a few weeks before the wedding we moved the ceremony from an outdoor location to an indoor one with a view. For Jen & Julios wedding, they were both hands on through all the planning. Jen literally made hundreds of tissue flowers to decorate the ceremony & reception with (she got the instructions from the Martha Stewart weddings magazine); Julio designed the wedding cake, and they both came in to the office to pick out their invitations together and went to meet with DJ together.
The ceremony was beautiful. I cried as usual. The bride wrote the ceremony herself and it included a "new family is born" piece as Jen has a daughter from a previous relationship. Jen also chose to stand on the right side, so that she could see her mom during the ceremony. I thought this was very sweet and unexpected twist on tradition. The reception was a huge party. DJ Ron had everyone on the dancefloor nonstop. They absolutely had a crowd that loved to dance. Especially the officiant- he went crazy on the dancefloor. Yep, he did the centipede, the running man, and the cabbage patch.

Thank you to all the men & women who have served our country. Where we we be without you? Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I had the great honor of planning Mandi & Andy's destination wedding, which took place earlier this month. It was without a doubt the most emotional wedding weekend I've ever been a part of. The groom is currently serving in the Army, and as I write this entry, he's back in Baghdad. We didn't know when Andy would actually arrive for the wedding until the day before he got here. His arrival was the most touching moment I've ever witnessed (look back a few posts). Many of the family members from both sides of the families also served in the armed forces.
For the rehearsal dinner, we planned it as a welcome home soldier party. We decked the place out in Red, White, and Blue. The brides mom also added "support our troops" yellow ribbons, and each guest wore a yellow lapel ribbon. The room looked great and was the complete opposite of the pink and crystal themed wedding the next day.
My tip of the day: Don't be afraid to go out and do something totally different for your rehearsal dinner. Host a casino party (these are SO much fun), have a luau, have a dessert only party, have a tailgate party, host a wine tasting... the possibilities are endless!
Todays picture: A snapshot of the Welcome home party decor. Sometimes piling it on is great!
Todays link: Here's a website I found if you would like to send the troops a message.
http://www.americasupportsyou.mil/americasupportsyou/Message.aspx?SectionID=5

To all the moms out there, I hope you've had a wonderful Mothers Day. I spent the day with my family and friends...another beautiful Florida spring day.
Today the mother and father of the bride for the next wedding arrived into town. Not too much hoopla surrounding their arrival. However, this past Monday, when the bride saw her groom for the 1st time in 5 months, and he finally had the opportunity to formally propose, it was a moment like nothing I have ever experienced. The groom has been serving our country in Baghdad all year. The below link (cut and paste!) will remind you of why we have weddings, why we marry, why we celebrate love.
Special thanks to Photographer Gigi Hamlett for providing the incredible photos (http://www.g2wed.com/)

Link: www.esocialites.com/LenttzPiazza.html
Todays Picture: That's me!