Custom Weddings

You all know that I am all about everything being custom. Every wedding is without a doubt different, but making that extra effort to be unique is what makes each wedding unforgettable. Lucky for us the next issue of Martha Stewart Weddings is focusing on customizing your weddings! I can't wait to get my hands on it of course. It will be on newsstands Monday.
This favor is one of my favorites ever. If you have time, you can make them yourself. Or, bring the photo to your local baker and ask for a quote- you might be surprised how inexpensive they can be. To customize them, order extra monogram stickers or seals with your wedding invitations and place them on the top of the box to secure the ribbon.

Thank you notes

As a bride you will send thank you note upon thank you note. Sometimes you will send 3 notes to the same person. "Thanks for the engagement gift, thanks for the shower gift, thanks for the wedding gift"
So rather than order 300 of the same notes, why not order a few different ones?
This card and photo came last week from Krista. It made me cry of course (because I always cry). But its just very neat that she even had thank you notes made for all her wedding vendors. Very thoughtful. Thank you Krista :)

Another reason I love my clients

I have the funniest clients on the face of the earth. Seriously, they crack me up daily.
Email of the week:

Hello Kelly,

This one isn't as bad as the last, we had a guest cancel. Name Removed can't make it, so Name Removed from table one is no longer. I am not replacing her though, so everyone can suck my big toe!

Lovely Boca Grande

Yesterday I met a bride and her mom on Boca Grande. It's another one of the gorgeous islands here on the Gulf of Mexico. Whats cool about Boca is that it's nothing but blue water, beaches, and cute little shops and restaurants. Everyone rides around in golf carts or walks. You can boat, fish, play golf, shop, sun, and eat ice cream all day everyday. It's really just a totally relaxing atmosphere thats perfect for a destination wedding.

Boy did I screw up.

So today I had a consultation with a lovely couple from Conneticut. We were supposed to meet at Barnes & Noble at 10am. I got there very early, so I sat in the cafe with my Chai Tea Latte (current drink obsession) and flipped through some wedding mags. About 10 minutes after they should have arrived I reached for my cell. IT WASN'T THERE. I had left it at home...an hour away! I waited another 20 minutes and then panic set in. I felt completely lost without it. Not only did I not have a phone, but I didn't have a quarter to use a payphone. Which as it turns out is fine since apparently payphones don't exist anymore. UGH.
So I went to a nearby restaurant, pleaded with a manager for use of the phone, and then called my husband using a calling card number that I somehow recalled from ages ago. My husband called the bride from my cell phone while I was on the other line. Of course, his cell dropped my call (again, ugh.), and I had to remember that 40 digit calling card # again. So using my husband as a middle man we were able to find a new place to meet a few minutes away. I just felt awful about the whole thing of course, and I still haven't figured out how I missed them at the Barnes & Noble in the 1st place. Anyway, lesson learned: never ever leave home without a cell phone.

Wedding Invitation like none other. WOW.

This has to be one of the coolest invitations ever. I have to say that if I got this cherry lollipop invitation, there's no way you could keep me from the wedding. The Lollipop has a monogram on one side and the invitation information on the other. The little tag underneath the satin bow is the RSVP and the envelope for the RSVP is just under the lollipop. This super chic invitation is packaged perfectly and arrives at your door ready to be addressed and mailed, each in its own white box with your monogram on the front. Love love love it. Yeah, there's a pretty hefty price tag. But some things are just so worth it. You can order them through your wedding planner or from Wedding Graffiti.

The totally fun part of wedding planning

A while back I posted about the "project manager-office job" part of wedding planning. Today, It's all about the fun stuff.
Yesterday I got to stop by one of my favorite florists, and pick up one of the most gorgeous centerpieces ever. Then I made my way through Sanibel Island and out to Captiva Island. Blue-Green water, and 3 dolphin sightings. Heaven.
I met my clients at one of the restaurants at their wedding resort for their menu tasting. Our tasting started with the passed hors dors for the cocktail hour. That's one of them in the picture- fresh fruit shooters! They were so refreshing, and I just loved the presentation. We got all giddy when chef brought them out because they were just so darn cute. We went through all the items and because of some dietary restrictions, I got to eat tons of food (oh darn). It was all sooooo good. Except for when the Chicken Satay came out. Then I frowned. Don't get me wrong, it tasted great, and it looked very nice in the presentation, but I have issues with Chicken Satay. I feel stupid walking around in a pretty dress, with a nice glass of wine in one hand, and a hunk of chicken on a stick in the other. I believe that all hors dors should be small enough to eat in one bite and not require a plate. So, I asked if we could change the presentation to a demi fork or spoon presentation. Chef said "sure!" and turned my frown upside down <~Giggle~>.
After filling up with all the goodies we went over to the actual reception site to do a table mock up. 5 different linen colors/fabrics, 3 chairs, and that fabo 9-part centerpiece. So fun. Love the combination we decided on- and it was not at all what I thought we would end up with. It's so very important to do this if you're able to.
After we decided on the linens, and narrowed down the chairs, we moved on to picking the colors for the Wedding Graffiti. I had ordered samples in each of her wedding colors. It was fun putting it up. As you can see...someone had a little trouble with the Aqua. It was hilarious.

Return Address Fixer Upper

Here's a cool thing for every bride who will be sending dozens of thank you notes. This is such a steal at $29- and free shipping with the code MARCH! Woohoo! You can find this Embosser at Horchow
They also have a very cool collection of mongogrammed and personalized items.
Know what else you can do with this nifty little object? You can make "Our new address" cards to insert with your thank you notes.

My great weekend

I've had a great weekend, the last one before wedding season kicks into high gear. Friday my husband and I celebrated our ninth wedding anniversary. We got dressed up and went to our favorite restaurant, Cru, for cocktails and dinner. I absolutely recommend you have dinner there when you are in Ft. Myers. Last night we had a bbq with friends and played Cornhole til the sun went down. For some reason everytime we play this Ohio born game, it gets chilly. It was about 65 degrees and why I was all wrapped up in this sweater.

The new wedding toast drink: TEQUILA!

Move over champagne, here comes something newer. Yep. It's new and very cool. I love the idea. This new celebration toast is a toast that the bride and groom give to their guests to say "We're so glad you came to celebrate with us- let's have a blast!" Its a great surprise for your guests, and really gets conversation going, and for sure will produce awesome photos.
What I recommend:
*Use a really good tequila, like Patron.
*Serve it in mini shot glasses with a lemon slice and salt on the side. A full sized shot is not necessary.
*Do the toast right after your 1st dance, before dinner. That way you have everyones attention and they'll be eating right away.
*Have the servers take the shot glasses and used slices away as they drop the salad course.

Sweet Summer Deal

Ok, I don't usually give away all the goods, but this is too good to keep a secret.
LaPlaya resort (Amazing resort on Naples Beach) is offering an amazing summer time deal. You can host an event there between June and September and the $4500 site fee is waived! So if you were considering throwing a top notch poolside bash, rehearsal dinner, engagement party, welcome recpetion- this is your place. You can call Tammy at LaPlaya for more info (239)598-5703.
If you do go, have the crunchy grouper. YUM.

Extraordinary Weddings

As I've mentioned before, I'm somewhat of a wedding book junkie. I finally got my hands on this one last week. Extraordinary Weddings they are! The book is really just stock full of beautiful pictures and great ideas. I have to hand it to Colin Cowie, the guy really knows his stuff. A few posts ago I wrote about being inspired. Books like these can really help you when you're trying to figure out what kind of wedding enviornment you might want to have. And its totally okay to bring these books to your wedding designer/planner and say, "I'd like to start here". A $500,000 budget isn't required to pull some of the elements into your wedding...it's just a matter of substitution and being creative.

Today while in traffic, crossing the bridge to Sanibel Island

I read my Starbucks coffee cup:
The Way I See It #189

Leadership requires relentless preparation. You cannot predict every possible challenge. But if you prepare for those challenges you can predict, you will be better equipped to handle all problems, even the unexpected ones.

-- Rudolph W. Giuliani
Former mayor of New York City.

Wedding Planners should memorize this. And I'd also like to mention that I just love that they write my name on the cup. So personal. Thank you Starbucks people.
----------------------------------------
I read the latest issue of Modern Bride (April/may 2007). Two things I put post-it notes on:
1. Target will have their very own line of wedding dresses beginning in May. Courtesy of Isaac Mizrahi. How about that. Just something I noticed, none of the dresses fit in the picture. HA! It looks like all the models are too tall for the dresses! Hilarious. One of them is actually hunched over to make it look long enough.
2. Real Wedding, Fake Giraffe. Page 142, Flowery Fete. Fabulous wedding- but I kid you not there's a life sized plastic giraffe witnessing the wedding. Obviously the bride didn't read my blog because I know where to get a real giraffe for your wedding. I am so cracking up right now. I must say though- everything else about the wedding- I LOVE. Very chic.

It's Sunday in L.A., what should you do?

How about going to the Soolip Wedding?
It looks like a pretty cool event. I'd go, but being that I'm something like 3000 miles away, not going to happen. Too bad, cause one of my favorite clients is out there and we'd probably have a blast. Really, it looks like there's a host of cool resources to check out. So if you have $65 and a bridesmaid with a few hours on her hands...

The Wedding Budget Series, Part 1: How much does the average wedding cost?

I have tried and tried to come up with a fail safe for this question and the truth is: There's no such thing as an average cost. I can tell you where to find out the average amount spent across the USA, but in no way will that hold up when it comes to your planning. Here's why; no 2 weddings are the same. In fact, I've never had 2 that were even remotely close to each other. I've planned weddings that were hundreds of thousands of dollars and I've planned weddings that were a couple thousand, and everything in between. Let me give you an example of how 2 weddings at the same to-die-for location, with the same amount of people can be so different in cost. Let's say there are 75 guests.
Wedding A:
The bride and groom decide to have their wedding on the beach on a Sunday at 11am. That way they can enjoy the gorgeous view of the Gulf of Mexico for the entire length of the ceremony & reception. Instead of a rehearsal dinner, they invite everyone out to the beach at 7:30pm, a half hour before sunset, play their favorite beach tunes on a portable cd player, and serve ice cream bars out of a cooler as they watch the sun go down. For the reception they choose a brunch buffet, which includes Salmon, Chicken, and ziti. They decide to host a consumption bar because people don’t typically drink as much during the day. For music, they hire a really good DJ to cover the entire event, but also have a soloist for the ceremony. For décor, the bride decided to stick with all roses in just 2 colors. Since it’s a Sunday afternoon, they were able to get a good deal on photography and videography coverage. The bride and all her bridesmaids had a Pina Colada-n-Papers party and made all the save the dates, invitations, and placecards.
Wedding B:
The bride and groom decide to have their wedding on a Saturday at 6:30pm. For the rehearsal dinner, they treated all 75 guests to a sunset cruise and a clambake on a nearby island. Their ceremony is on the beach with chivari chairs covered in a sheer light flowing wrap. A beautiful sunset cocktail hour with a mojito and martini bar, cigar roller, and a sushi station. A dinner under the stars is their dream. They choose a plated 5-course surf and turf meal for their guests with a five-hour open bar and wine service during dinner. For music, they have a string quartet at the ceremony, steel pan and guitar at the cocktail hour, a 12-piece band for the reception, and a DJ for the after party. For décor, the bride brings the florist a photo of Donald Trumps wedding reception and says, “I’d like this, only in my colors”. For the wedding stationary, the bride goes to a custom stationary designer and calligrapher for the save the dates, invitations, menus, programs, and place cards.

In both cases, the couple is getting their dream wedding at their dream location. So can you see how giving an average is difficult? The cost of each of these weddings- how about I let you make your best guess? Post your estimates via the comment link and I’ll post the answer and winner tomorrow. The winner will receive the next issue of Grace Ormonde Wedding Style- since it was the winner of the last survey. This is open to everybody: brides, grooms, wedding professionals…hope to hear from lots of you!

The Wedding Budget Series

Budgets are a big subject, so I decided to make this a 6 part series. The topics I'll hit on are:
*Average costs
*Prioritizing
*Guest counts
*Being Reasonable
*The extras to budget for (cushions)
*When you need the money
Feel free to ask a question through the comment link anonamously and I'll be sure to answer as best I can.

The winner from Part 1: Lazar Soiree! Although she was the only guess, she came really close to actual costs.
Wedding A: $13,000 Wedding B: $67,500
The 3 big differences between the 2 weddings:
*Weekday wedding = lower site fees and minimum requirements
*Brunch meal = lower catering and bar fees
*Decor and music choices

If I see this happen one more time I'll scream

I just got back from a wedding. I was not the wedding planner. Apparently, nobody was. I have 2 things to say and then I promise I won't bring it up again.

ONE: Mothers of the brides should not have to work at their daughters weddings. Tonight I saw this poor woman doing everything. Including controlling the drunk Maid of honor, the brides sister. She also was responsible for lining up the wedding party (3 times), releasing the tables (are you kidding me?), and moving ceremony flowers to the reception. I'm sure she was also responsible for packing up the car with the 40 boxed gifts at the end of the night.

TWO: If you aren't going to do anything else, give your DJ a timeline that says when you want everything done by. You should not have 1/2 your wedding guests already gone by the time you do your best mans toast. And another 1/4 gone before you have your cake cut. I am not kidding- only 10% of the wedding guests were left for the cake cutting tonight, and the couple had to fork over another few hundred dollars to keep the photographer an extra hour because everything ran so late.

Say Goodbye to Big Blank Walls

At almost every venue you have one; the dreaded blank space. Sure, you could add another flower arrangement. Or perhaps a photo collage. Been there done that. My current design obsession is Wedding Graffiti. Its just the neatest thing! Totally customizable, inexpensive, and does it ever grab attention. I love the simplicity of a monogram just behind the sweetheart table. Imagine that photo! Or like in this photo, it totally transforms the otherwise typical (but still pretty) ceremony site into a gorgeous statement.
Oh, and I have tested it- it doesn't harm walls, its super easy to apply and remove.

What makes a wedding a destination wedding?

des*ti*na*tion (des'ti-nAy'shen) n. The place to which one is going or directed.
There's a little debate about this, but I will tell you what I think. A destination wedding is one where the wedding is taking place in a location such that the majority of guests are travelling. So, even if the bride and groom live at the wedding location; if all the majority of their guests have to travel to get there- its a destination wedding.
What makes this different from a regular wedding is that while it is more complex in the planning, it also provides for a more intimate experience and quality time spent. Because everyone is going to be together for at least 2 days, you'll actually get to spend time having fun with your guests! Not just the 5 minute quick, stop by to say "hello thanks for coming", during the tour of the tables at your reception dinner. Read back a few posts to see what a destination wedding weekend can be: Documenting your entire wedding weekend
Do you have to do all these events? Absolutely not! But considering that all the people you care about most are travelling to celebrate with you, take advantage of it!
Chances are when you are having a destination wedding that you will have less "yes" RSVP's than if you have it at a location central to the majority of invited guests. So a destination wedding can certainly be less costly. Also, many popular wedding destinations are just plain old less expensive than "home". It's just like that house buying show on HGTV, What you get for the money I think its called; what $30,000 buys you in New York City buys you a whole lot more on Sanibel or Captiva Island. A destination wedding can actually be a budget saver.
So then whats a destination wedding planner? A destination wedding planner is experienced in planning not just weddings, but also experienced in weddings where there are travel and multiple events for the guests involved. Some destination wedding planners only plan weddings in the area they reside in, and some destination planners will also help you plan a wedding outside of the region. Tip: when you're looking for your wedding planner, they may not call themselves a "destination wedding planner", just ask if they have experience planning them.

Wedding Bells

Well how about that. I hate to be harsh, I really do. But I was so looking forward to a really funny show about wedding planners and their experiences. Boy was I ever duped by the previews.
I only laughed twice during the show, both times at the assistant who was responsible for chasing down the blonde wedding crashing twins.
I guess I am most shocked because it was so absurd. There are enough hilarious wedding stories that really happen, which could totally be exaggerated into a sitcom format, to have the show run twice daily. But nooooooo, instead they have a wedding planner sleeping with married groomsmen in broom closets, a chef seducing yet another wedding planner with Putinesca, a chain smoking bride running down the street and over a guy, and a mother of the bride faking tears with visine. And that whole thing with the bride and the band leader? Give me a break. Ugh.
Seriously, if they had just taken the Law and Order method, you know, "Ripped from the headlines", the show would have been hilarious. Somebody get me a producer.

Cookies for Comments!

"So excited!" Ok, well, maybe I do get excited about alot of things. But today I am really very excited because I just got my 1st batch of Weddings by Socialites Cookies! After 5 years, I really needed a change. So last month I unveiled the new logo. And I have to admit, I love the new look. But I want to know what you think too. SO- if you send me a comment, I will send you a cookie! Make sure your email address is good so that I can email you for your mail address.
I also want to say thank you to Chris Ketchum at Masons Bakery for making these cookies for me. The cookies actually make fabo wedding favors (that's how I found them of course). For my last wedding the couple had 4 different photos made into cookies and gave each guest a set. Their guests just loved them- especially when they found themselves on a cookie!
If you want to get some photo cookies, contact Chris at Masons , and tell him Kelly sent ya.

So pretty I had to share it

I came across this website this morning while I was looking for a newer way to use the "Wedding Monogram". They do all kinds of monograms, but I just thought that this runner was fantastic. You can get this runner (for just over $100), and about any other kind of monogramed item at Filigree Monogram Designs

Wedding tv shows

Someone asked me what my favorite wedding tv shows are. Truth is, I like them all. Although I usually only get to watch them when I have insomnia (I am so thankful for DVR!). Anyway, here's my list:
Platinum Weddings on WE
Married Away on WE
Whose Wedding is it Anyway on Style
Martha Stewart Weddings on Style
I also of course love to see the In Style celebrity wedding specials that occasionally run on ABC. And I will also admit that I watch Bridezillas every now and again too. It's just hard to fathom that brides can really be like that. Good grief.
There are some new wedding specials do out this spring, I'll post a note here when I know more.
OH! This Wednesdayday at 9pm est there's a new show airing on Fox, The Wedding Bells. It's a sitcom about 3 wedding planners. The previews look hilarious.

Pictures go a long way

Back to that whole inspiration post...
When you meet with your wedding planner, florist, cake baker, venue coordinator, etc. Bring clippings, swatches, and photos. Anything that will help you better explain the wedding you are envisioning. You don't need to be tied down to these photos though. Take them as a starting point, and let the vendors build off of them. If you're working with true professionals they'll be able to help you develop a wedding that's truly unique to you using the things you've brought as a foundation.
Just be sure to be clear about things that might be unclear. For instance, let's say you whip out a clipping from Grace Ormonde Wedding Style and its a photo of a reception where all the chairs are covered. You say to her, "I love this look" If you don't tell the florist you aren't covering the chairs at your reception- she might miss the opportunity to suggest that you tie a ribbon with an orchid to each chair.

Its the little things

It's just my opinion, but I think its the little things that really make a difference. For instance, last night we had a small dinner party. I put a small arrangement (6 blooms in a julep cup) of fresh flowers (from the grocery store) in the bathroom, right next to a little votive candle. Did I need to? Nope. It's just a bathroom, and most people spend less than 2 minutes in there. But you know what? At least 4 people told me how nice it was. I also decided to actually light some of the candles around the rest of the house and leave a few lights off. Voila! Somehow my house instantly changed into a very warm and inviting place to sit down, relax and enjoy some great food with people I love being with.
Oh, and at my dinner parties, we always have entertainment. Last night we did a little Karaoke. It was hilarious to say the least. I am beyond tone deaf. However, that does not stop me from taking the mic and belting out Love Shack and Hey Jude. If you want to have a karaoke night too, check out Lead Singer, its pretty cool.

Wedding design: How I am inspired

The other day I was having a consult with a bride and we were at the beginning stages of designing her wedding. I brought out all the wedding books of course. She brought a picture of the dress she was going to buy and the colors she wanted to use. I explained to her that its easier for me to create a wedding for her on her budget if she explained to me what she wanted if the budget was unlimited. Is that what she described to me? Nope. She was holding back and I knew it. So we just sat and talked and flipped through books, I wrote down notes that I knew were useless, until she said it, "I had always dreamed I would get married in a castle in Ireland". She said this not even knowing she said it- and that in one word, she inspired her entire wedding design. That was what I was looking for. "castle!" Between the colors she gave me and that one word, I knew exactly what direction to head in. Ivory, champagne, gold. Dim, candles, candelabras, fancy iron work, heavy draping that puddles, tassles.
Only thing was- her dress did not match the design. Not even a little. So, without saying anything about it of course, I made some slight changes to the design so that the dress wouldn't seem out of place. Because you just don't mess around with a bride and her dress! And I admit that I had a little bit of wedding designer nightmare about it. But don't you know, not 12 hours later did she email me to say, "I changed my dress, and I love it, now it all goes together"
So how am I most often inspired? By my clients. It's usually one word they mention that pulls it all together. Whodathunk?

Crying at and about a wedding

I cry at every wedding. Seriously, every single one. And its always at the same times:
When I see my bride in her dress.
When I see the look on the grooms face when he sees his bride the 1st time.
The 1st dance.
The father of the brides toast (and sometimes the dance too).
When I have to say goodbye.

Saying goodbye is the worst though. I can't tell you how many times I have sat and outright sobbed with a bride. I do get attached to my clients. Usually we've been working together for nearly a year or longer on the most important day of her life! How could I not get attached?
So yeah, I get pretty excited when the photographer releases the pictures. And I can't wait to share them with everyone and hang my favorite in my office. And I just love when they get video and the videographer sends me a copy. I get such a kick out of watching everyone so happy. I pop popcorn, call in my girls, and we watch together. Emily (she's 4) doesn't understand why I cry when I watch the wedding dvd's. But she does love to dance along with the reception highlights. Madeline (she's 8), she cries with me. I guess we're both romantics.

Weddings are so great.

Cupcakes.

I know, I already posted today, but I'm on hold... I hate being on hold.

I totally bought this book just because of a friend of mine. The thought of a tea party, is so darling. I haven't been to one- ever. But I plan on doing one. As soon as I find time. Yeah right, spare time. Anyway, I was out shopping today for a wedding later this month and I found this book while I was in line. And I was like, "Aw, how cute, cupcakes." I started skimming through it and I came to this page and said, "ok, now I have to buy it just so I can show Risa." Risa owns The Partea Planner out in California. She's also a wedding planner & designer- one of the best wedding designers I know. Check out her website if you want to see why I want to have a tea party.

"Your job is so cool" Warning: Long Post.

I giggle a little when people say this to me. I do love what I do; I love planning weddings. You couldn't possibly convince me that there's a better job out there. However, when people say this to me its either at the wedding, when they see me smiling off to the side(dancing just a little cause the band rocks!) or crying tears of joy. Or during wedding venue tours, when we're going to all these fabulous locations looking at beaches, tasting food, and eating cake. That part of being a wedding planner is so beyond great- who wouldn't want to do that?
But I giggle because never do wedding guests or clients see me in my office, with 2 computers, a fax machine, 3 phones, bookshelves full of client binders, and filing cabinets full of vendor and resource information. On my typical day I am tied to the office for 9 hours. I get 15-20 emails per hour. Most of my 8-10 phone calls take at least 15 minutes. I wish it was just my brides calling me; because I love talking to them, but I have to actually plan their weddings, and that means talking to all their vendors too. Most weddings have about 20 contracts of some sort. I have to take care of all that. Cool right?
If I have to give up some of that office time for meetings, I'm in the office on the weekend, in the evenings, and sometimes before dawn. And that's after the usual weekend meetings with clients. Because, I meet with clients when they aren't working their jobs! Then there's the calendar on the wall. Right now there are 17 weddings on that calendar (between now and next April 2008). I am a multi-tasking master. So, what it comes down to is that my job might be fairly similar to any other project-manager-office-job most of the time. Cool right?
Then there's wedding week. Adrenaline takes over big time. No matter what, there will be fires to put out, chaos to control, and a mess to clean up. No matter what, I always end up working at least 20 hours straight 3 days in a row, I might get to eat one meal (which is cold, while standing up, in a corner, in the dark), and there's no such thing as a bathroom break. Cool right?
Truly, my friends think I am insane for doing what I do. My husband thinks I work too much. My kids, they seem to get it (kids are cool like that). My dad- he didn't think I was running a real business until he read an article about me in a magazine; and this was just a few months ago (I've been in business for years!).

My job is cool- for me. Again, I love it, and there are some seriously fun parts. But it is not for everyone, thats for sure. I'll post about the fun parts later, but right now I have 17 weddings to plan. Hee Hee.